Dawn Forever Comes
and other encouragements for uplifting your inner state
I would be remiss to suggest that consent to spiritual transformation is anything less than a crucifixion. I once heard Cynthia Bourgeault say something which has stuck with me: “When we embark on the spiritual journey, we think we’re all gonna sit around singing kum-ba-yah with yoga bodies. But this isn’t so.” One time I asked Cynthia, if we are made in the image of God, then is there not darkness in God as well? First, she laughed so hard I turned red and everyone started to squirm. Then she said: “Creation itself is the darkness of God.”
I really couldn’t understand then and maybe I don’t now, but then again, how else do we explain the terror here? Could it be that the unmanifest dimensions of God are the Light, and the manifest dimensions the Dark. Can you consider the possibility that matter itself is the subconscious of God? But hold on, because the Taijitu reveals that within every darkness is a spec of light; no expression is all black or all white as the non-dualist knows well.
If the manifest universe is the subconscious of God, could humanity be the spec of light? The evolutionary edge, the tip of God’s iceberg, the inherent potentiality of God remembering God? I’ve always sensed we had an important cosmic role to play, but could it be so grand; is this the meaning of co-laborer? One working against the black of night to bear the dawn… of God?
Perhaps the most practical application here is our inability to escape the dark and the promise of returning to the light - which we literally do every single day without fail. When I first realized the day itself is practice for death, it blew my mind.
Every night I go to sleep, I practice dying. Why are we so afraid when dawn forever comes?
Maybe I am getting to the point I really want to make. We would be remiss to imagine spiritual transformation as anything less than crucifixion. We would be remiss to wish for an eternal campfire around which we sit in perfect health, harmonizing. It is not that I think the lion will never lie down with the lamb. I just think it’s important we stay oriented to time and process and take honest stock of what we should expect when devoting ourselves to waking up.
We only wake up on the other side of night.
Night, as it is for the human being, is unconscious sleep that renders us completely useless. Only when we arise from our bed of dreams do we create the possibility of usefulness.
Many mornings lately, I have prayed for the grace to leave my bed of dreams. I have asked that, if at all possible, the cup of life-as-I-know-it be taken. And truly truly I tell you, I’ve been granted just enough to complete what is mine to do.
Why am I confused, when Jesus depicted it all so plainly? A resurrected life is only made possible when we consent to the inner cross - death to all we’ve dreamed unconsciously.
So as dark as this message might initially feel, I hope it will meet you in your valley of shadows to offer a spec of light. If we are willing to endure it, night is never the end. Sunday morning always comes, and what a time as this to remember, on the cusp of holy week. Maybe we are in the garden, sweating blood, begging to turn back. But God, in God’s unending mercy, still sends us to the cross so our transformation may be complete.
If nothing else, I hope your perception of the hard stuff softens. I hope you can take the cup anyway, trusting the medicine of your consent and grace of God to offer it… considering the possibility that your willingness to rise from a bed of unconscious dreams is the very consciousness of God dawning.
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ALSO SOMETIMES YOU JUST NEED A RUN:
Maybe it’s obvious I’ve been anguishing in a Lenten shadow valley. That is true and it’s also true I went very-too-long without moving my body, spiraling myself into a depressive episode. Believe me, I am the first to over-spiritualize everything and sometimes, you just need a damn run. If you feel stuck, depressed, irritable, or dramatically existential, here’s 10 simple ways to change your state:
Put on a feel-good song and dance or do squats. Use my playlist.
Take a bath. Add bubbles.
Cook vegetable soup. (Sub cannellini beans for kidney, don’t skip the lemon juice!)
Try to find sensation in your feet. Continue on, keeping this in mind.
Build a fort with your kid.
Color, paint, or draw.
Breathe in saying inwardly “I,” breathe out “Am.” Repeat five times or more.
Go outside. Stand in the grass for five minutes barefoot.
Bake blueberry oatmeal muffins. (Omit the honey.)
RUN OR WALK FAST FOR 20 MINUTES.
Most of us, most of the time, can pretty well assume our negativity is an over-activation of the intellectual center, or mind. The best thing we can do is regain awareness of our bodies; chopping vegetables works as well as yoga. Anything that momentarily diverts your attention from your head to your bones usually does the trick.
Other times, a deep spiritual work is being done. It’s time for something old to pass away, for night to come. Recognize the inherent suffering (loss, grief, pain) in this process, as well as the promise for new life. Every cracked-open seed is the potential for a sprout.
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LISTEN TO THE LATEST INNER EYE RECORDINGS:
The tagline for my “podcast” is: It's like we sat down for coffee and I never gave you a chance to speak. Readers submit questions and I stab at answers. Because I care a lot about The Work and want to see its influence reach a larger audience, I am recording one work-related podcast for all subscribers each month. This month’s is about Joy and listening might be another clever idea for changing your state, an antidote to your suffering. Honestly, spirit came through and it’s a rich listen, if I do say myself. Tap below for access.
Because I want to gift the generous folks who support me with money, I record an additional podcast just for them each month. If you become a paid subscriber, you also receive discounts on all upcoming classes (WHICH ARE IN THE WORKS I PROMISE). This month’s recording discusses the importance of settling down in a spiritual tradition and the distinct difference between eastern and western spirituality. We also explore the notion of conscious ego!
If you enjoy reading this publication and gain from it’s content, I hope you’ll consider upgrading your subscription!
Praying as James Finley taught me to pray:
For all that has been, thank you.
For all that will be, Yes.
